Tuesday 12 January 2010

She Left Me

She Left Me

She left me
In a howling wind
By a steaming train
On a misty morning
Alone
Beside the rusting rails
In the damp drizzle
Of the Derby dales

 

The destination list
In my hand
Telling me
Every departure
Is heading
Due south
Out of town
And I’m standing
Under an overhang
In a shadow
Eyeing the snapshot
Memory
Of forgotten promises
Reminding me
Of dharma bums
And Hobo days

It’s always easier
For the one who goes
Than for the one who stays ..



I strolled along the tarmac
Detouring
Edged back
Onto the endless platform

Stretching like a highway
From yesterdays hollow dream
Into a never-ending tomorrow
Of sorrow
Pulling me toward it
Pushing me away

Crashing into my life
Like a runaway
Locomotive
Careering out of control
Onto the sidelines
Of my misaligned
Monotonous
Daily grind

 

You came in like a thief
You stole the moment
Like a movie star
Shedding a past love
In the sequel to
Last summer’s blockbuster
Affair
Cooling
In the discovery of
New roles
To play
In the limelight
Of red carpet fantasies
That populate
These fleeting instants



Shared glances
Like flashbulbs igniting
A glimpse of your cloudy soul

You flew into
My threadbare existence
On your magic carpet
Pulled the worn rug
From under my faltering ankles
Yanking
The last fraying
Strings of sanity
Linking me to the reality
Supporting the foundation
Of crumbling bricks
I’d built my shaky house
On the rocks ..

So pour me one too
And we’ll
Skim the surface
Of the slippery slope
And slide
Into the future
Like a baby
Into
A waiting
Midwife’s arms
You arrived
As a carpetbagger
Hawking your wares in public
Selling me
Every trick in the book
Pulling a rabbit from every hat
Every last drop of my blood
That was sucked from my veins
Went down the drain
With the rest of the waste
And all the heartbreak
Into the sewer pipe
Of an aching sigh
That rumbled and purred
In your throat

Gargling a mimic
Of the sounds of
True love
Sacred
Spontaneous emotion
That captured my heart
Snared in forbidden passion
The few remaining seconds
Shared in a life worth living
I took a breath
And held it
Thinking
How long can I hold this
Thought?

Breath I thought
Breath
Exhale I thought
Breath exhale
Don’t breath
Play along
Don’t play

Play at Love
Play Be Real
Play Dead
Why?
Play

Why Play
With Love?

***

As I cast my sail to the wind of change, turning away from the rocky shores where many have lost their hearts swimming against the tide of time, I offer this fragment of a tale ..

With passion, regret, longing, anger, fear and all the other confused and altered memories that accompany a separation of soul mates, I've tried to present a personal yet fictionalis
ed account of that emotive sense of lost love as it manifests itself in the early stages ..

As an artist I try to open myself to all the potentialities life presents – I believe that dreams require effort and risk and taking chances is essential to growth .. and this piece is but another examination of the wanderings of a poet through the encounters that create those opportunities for experience ..